E Zine of KV Pattom published by the Library

Archive for the ‘simply Fun’ Category

FUN FACTOR

In simply Fun on September 23, 2008 at 11:32 pm

1) CHILD: Mom I got 100 marks in a test.?

MOTHER: How??

CHILD: Hindi: 20

????????????? Maths: 20

????????????? S.S.T: 20

????????????? Sanskrit: 20

????????????? Science: 20?

CHILD: So, mom 20+20+20+20+20= 100

MOTHER: Stupid by adding you got 100?

 

2) A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.?
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The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.?
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For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said: “Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!”?
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The passenger apologized and said, “I didn’t realize that a little tap would scare you so much.”?
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The driver replied, “Sorry, it’s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver – I’ve been driving a van carrying dead Bodies for the last 25 years…..

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3) A woman walked up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.?
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“I couldn’t help noticing how happy you look,” she said. “What’s your secret for a long happy life?”?
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“Well, honey, I smoke five packs of cigarettes a day,” he said. “Five packs of cigarettes!!!”?
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“I also drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods, and never exercise.”?
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“That’s amazing,” the woman said. “How old are you?”?
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“Twenty-eight,” he said.?

 

 

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Discoveries and Inventions by Men And Women
Men discovered COLOURS and invented PAINT, ?
Women discovered PAINT and invented MAKEUP. ?
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Men discovered the WORD and invented CONVERSATION, ?
Women discovered CONVERSATION and invented GOSSIP. ?
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Men discovered AGRICULTURE and invented FOOD, ?
Women discovered FOOD and invented DIET. ?
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Men discovered FRIENDSHIP and invented LOVE, ?
Women discovered LOVE and invented MARRIAGE. ?
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Men discovered TRADING and invented MONEY, ?
Women discovered MONEY and invented SHOPPING. ?
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Thereafter Men have discovered and invented a lot of things… ?
While Women STUCK to shopping.?
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5) A blind man was waiting to cross the road when his guide dog peed on his leg. He reached into his pocket and took out a biscuit for the dog. ?
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A passer by who’d seen everything remarked: “That’s very tolerant of you after what he just did.” ?
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“Not really,” came the reply. “I’m just finding out where his mouth is, so I can kick him.”

 

 

 

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THE TIGER BEATEN BY ITS PARENTS by Aneesh B.S.

In simply Fun on January 31, 2008 at 7:35 pm

How can we jump from a 100 feet ladder and not get hurt?
Ans. Jump from the first step.

From where did the tiger get his marks on his body?
Ans.He was beaten by his parents.

Where is happiness always found?
Ans.In dictionary.

Why is hammer so clever?
Ans.B’coz it uses its head.

Three large women walked under an umbrella but none of them got wet. WHY?
Ans. B’coz it was not raining.

By

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Aneesh B.S. 

IX D